Just Nod If You Can Hear Me

It’s 4:30 am and I’m getting ready to head out to the swamp. I’ve been up since 1 trying to be sure I don’t forget anything vital this trip. I’ve made a trip to get fuel, visit the big city that has a Walmart and am now gathering all the stuff I haul back and forth.

My last week out was very productive. Amos and Hannah were up for a couple of days which is always a treat. He stopped by one afternoon and helped me screen in most of the first floor porch. I had been thinking about it for quite some time but it was just one of those jobs which require two sets of hands. In a little over two hours we had the screen up and sitting in the shade admiring our work. We were also impressed with how much it cut down on the number of yellow flies stalking us for a free meal.

They left the next morning which always sends the Zigster into a tail spin since he affectionately refers to Hannah as the “Cookie Monster”. After comforting him for a bit I set about framing in a screen door for the porch then tried to build a door. I screwed it up like polio but it was late afternoon by then, I was tired so I set it aside for the next trip out. I’ll have to break out the sawzall and do some major adjustments to make it work. I hope I can make it work.

I visited the Preacher last trip as well. He has a neat cabin built out of some super insulated stuff that is amazing. He and his wife have installed some screen doors, “As Seen On TV” that I fell in love with. A major purchase at Walmart this morning was two sets of screens which will go up later today. I’m hoping to get the shack to the point that I can sleep in peace without having to wear heavy wool socks, a long sleeved shirt and blue jeans. Nights are warm now so having to wear so many clothes is very uncomfortable.

My brush cutter is still being repaired, under warranty I hope, so the weeds are having a party out there. I’m hoping for a rainy day soon so I can break out the kerosene and burn some of it back. Not the best solution to the problem but with the brush cutter and mower out of commission it’s about the best I can do. Fire is a major concern out there so setting one intentionally isn’t undertaken lightly.

Time to start loading again. A lot of people think that I just jump in the truck and cruise off into the sunset. (sunrise in this case) I typically carry a 12 gauge shotgun, AR-15, 22 magnum rifle and a bag of pistols. Two coolers, gas cans, laptop, my food, the Zigster food and clean clothes. Sheesh, no wonder I’m worn out by the time I get there and unload.

Well, I’ll add more from the swamp and post this when I get back in about two weeks.

Got out to the swamp yesterday about 9 am, unloaded then spent the rest of the day on organizing and cleaning. Even with a fan last night it was past midnight before the shack cooled to below 80. With all the insulating I’ve been doing the shack tends to hold heat. I really need to look into building a wind tower or a passive geothermal heating/cooling system.

I did get the “As Seen On TV” screen up yesterday, thanks to a staple gun and a lot of duck tape. Since my door is shorter and wider than normal I had to get really creative to make it work. But, it’s up and works fairly well. The Zig is slowly getting used to it though I have to check to make sure it closed all the way whenever he goes in or out.

I spent today working on the screen door for the porch. Not being at all skilled in wood workology I was at decided disadvantage. About 4:30 it rained a bit so I used that as an excuse to quit for the day. Hopefully tomorrow I can finish then put the last of the screen up.

A few days have passed with not much, other than rain, happening. I’m close to lighting off the generator to charge batteries since we’ve not had but a very few hours of sun for nearly five days. On the positive side, it has been pretty cool and temps are down in the good sleeping range at night.

I did finish screening the porch. Building the door seemed to take forever with me making every mistake possible. I still need to put in a Ziggy door since he’s having nothing to do with the door I built for him.

I’m headed to town tomorrow for a short time. I’m planning on only being there long enough to grab a shower, post this, pick up a few supplies then head back out. Speaking of posting, I’m not sure I’ll be able to upload pix but we’ll see.

You might find the following interesting. I’ll be posting 15 “planks” at a time.


On Jan. 10, 1963, Congressman Albert S. Herlong Jr. of Florida read a list of 45 Communist goals into the Congressional Record. The list was derived from researcher Cleon Skousen’s book “The Naked Communist.” These principles are well worth revisiting today in order to gain insights into the thinking and strategies of much of our so-called liberal elite:

  1. U.S. should accept coexistence as the only alternative to atomic war.
  2. U.S. should be willing to capitulate in preference to engaging in atomic war. [Note: These encapsulate the Kennan Doctrine, which advocated for the “containment” of communism. Establishment figures supporting the amoral containment policy at least implicitly worked with the communists in scaring the wits out of the American people concerning atomic war. President Ronald Reagan undid the doctrine when he took an aggressive stand against the Evil Empire by backing freedom fighters from around the world that were struggling against the left-wing communist jackboot. As a result, the Soviet Union and its satellites imploded, a considerable and unexpected setback to the international communist edifice.]
  3. Develop the illusion that total disarmament by the U.S. would be a demonstration of “moral strength.” [Note: The nuclear freeze advocates supported a freeze on American nuclear development only. Rarely were Soviet nukes or those of other nations mentioned in their self-righteous tirades. The same advocates now call for reducing American military might, claiming that there is something immoral about America preserving its military pre-eminence in the world.]
  4. Permit free trade between all nations regardless of Communist affiliation and regardless of whether or not items could be used for war. [Note: Today, there are calls to end the embargo on the slave island of Cuba, there were complaints about the embargo against Iraq, and the U.S., not Saddam Hussein, was blamed for the suffering of the Iraqi people. Would they have advocated for free trade with Hitler and his National Socialist regime?]
  5. Extend long-term loans to Russia and Soviet satellites.
  6. Provide American aid to all nations regardless of Communist domination. [Note: Such aid and trade over decades contributed greatly to the left-wing communist liquidation of over 100 million people worldwide, according to the well-documented “Black Book of Communism.” This aid and trade marks a shameful chapter in American history. Without the aid and trade, the left-wing international communist behemoth would have imploded on its own rot a lot sooner and umpteen millions would have been saved from poverty, misery, starvation and death.]
  7. Grant recognition of Red China and admission of Red China to the U.N. [Note: Not only did President Jimmy Carter fulfill this goal but he also betrayed America’s allies in Nicaragua, El Salvador, Iran, Afghanistan, Angola and elsewhere.]
  8. Set up East and West Germany as separate states in spite of Khrushchev’s promise in 1955 to settle the Germany question by free elections under supervision of the U.N.
  9. Prolong the conferences to ban atomic tests because the U.S. has agreed to suspend tests as long as negotiations are in progress.
  10. Allow all Soviet satellites individual representation in the U.N.
  11. Promote the U.N. as the only hope for mankind. If its charter is rewritten, demand that it be set up as a one-world government with its own independent armed forces. [Note: There are still American intellectuals, and elected members of Congress, who dream of an eventual one world government and who view the U.N., founded by communists such as Alger Hiss, the first secretary-general, as the instrument to bring this about. World government was also the dream of Adolf Hitler and J.V. Stalin. World government was the dream of Osama bin Laden and the 9/11 hijackers.]
  12. Resist any attempt to outlaw the Communist Party. [Note: While the idea of banning any political party runs contrary to notions of American freedom and liberty, notions that are the exact opposite of those held by the left-wing communists themselves, nevertheless these goals sought to undermine the constitutional obligation of Congress to investigate subversion. The weakening of our government’s ability to conduct such investigations led to the attack of 9/11.]
  13. Do away with loyalty oaths. [Note: It is entirely proper and appropriate for our government to expect employees, paid by the American taxpayer, to take an oath of loyalty.]
  14. Continue giving Russia access to the U.S. Patent Office.
  15. Capture one or both of the political parties in the U.S.


It’s that time of year. I’m announcing the first annual “Swamp Games 2017”!

I’ve been thinking about games which could prove useful for the family types who venture out here on the rare occasion they are all gripped with some form of collective insanity. After all, while the adults take three or four naps a day the children still need some sort of entertainment. In this article you will find a veritable treasure trove of tips to keep the young ones occupied. So this article fits today’s model of political correctness because after all, it’s for the children.

I call the first game “Ouch, Shit, Crap!” Those of you who are loyal readers may remember this quote from a post last year concerning yellow flies. This is a frequently heard exclamation out here during yellow fly season. We are entering the peak of yellow fly season and control of these little muzloid monsters is on every ones mind. “Ouch, Shit, Crap!” is specifically designed to help reduce the geehawdi movement.

To start, all the children should be assembled, rules explained, equipment issued and prizes displayed.

If you don’t feed the children frequently assembling them should be as easy as shouting “Ya wanna treat?” This works every time on my pit bull so it should work well. Of course if you want it to continue to work in the future you will need to give each child a treat. I suggest something with a lot of sugar and caffeine so they enter the game with a lot of energy and enthusiasm. A cup of extra strong coffee and sugar doughnut comes to mind.

The rules are really very simple although you can embellish them as needed for older children, say over the age of six or seven. Since the goal of the game is to see which child can kill or capture the most yellow flies in a set time period, six or eight hours is a good start, there aren’t many rules. So wing it.

Equipment is also negligible. A fly swatter and zip loc bag is about it. You want to avoid bug sprays, mosquito netting, gloves, etc. since the children will want to attract as many flies as possible within the time allotted. You might want to include calamine lotion in the suite of prizes.

By the end of six or eight hours your charges will be willing to kill for a bit of calamine lotion so it won’t take much to put the prize package over the top. Kept hungry, a popsicle and a ham sandwich might be all it takes to turn the horde into rampaging fly killers. If there are several children you can offer a second place prize. A shot of Southern Comfort with ice water chaser will help calm them after the excitement of the hunt.

There are a great many benefits to be had from this game. The children will learn eye hand coordination as they swat flies while learning how to hone their skill with each swat. It will also sharpen their reflexes as they react to the painful bites.

You will enjoy having fewer bites as you sip a few brews while watching the sun set. Don’t forget to wear gloves, insect repellent, mosquito netting and long sleeves.

A word of warning to any socialist democrats who happen to stumble across this blog. Don’t divide the flies at the end of the time period and award a prize to each child. Stupid is inherited and this will only teach them that competition doesn’t matter so the next time you play the game there will be no flies to count. They will only hole up somewhere in the shade and play with their toes all day. You need those kids swatting plus the fat kids will lose weight running from flies which is enough to justify the game in itself.

In the swamp, bears are a fact of life. You really, really don’t want to wander off into the brush to answer the call of nature then run across a bear. You could easily overheat not to mention the terrible mess of cleaning out your pants after sprinting a mile at top speed while screaming like a scared little girl. To avoid this situation you should teach the children a game I call “Where’s The Bear?”

There is only one rule for this game, don’t get eaten. Socialist democrats may want to strike this rule since the checks will probably still keep coming and you can always find another baby daddy to make more.

Equipment is a bit more elaborate than “Ouch, Shit, Crap!” As a minimum each child will need a topographical map, waterproof marker, GPS, walky talky, watch and compass. With each sighting the GPS coordinates are entered on the map, time noted and all information reported via walky talky.

At the end of the contest the surviving child with the most sightings wins. In case of a tie you might want to give each child a small club so the last child standing wins all.

You will soon learn which areas to avoid at what times of day. Bears tend to travel a set pattern and knowing this will endear you to whomever does your laundry.

Children are bound to love this game. They will learn tracking skills, how to recognize bear scat, map skills, radio communications, plus escape and evasion. It can also be viewed as a weight reduction program.

Have any ideas for “Swamp Games 2017”? Post them in comments. This could end up being an Olympic event. Be sure to get in on the ground floor.

No animals, muzloids, poisonous snakes, snowflakes or other vermin were harmed in the production of this post. Copyright 2017 by Ishimo; no rights reserved.